Of all the things that happened on this endless week of American Idol auditions, nothing is more mysterious than this: How did the woman in the photo above only get a few seconds of screentime during a crying montage in the Salt Lake City episode?
I mean, just look at the puppet she’s holding. The mind boggles to think what she did with that thing in the audition room. Did they sing a duet? “Islands in the Stream,” maybe? Did Granny sassmouth Simon when he inevitably said her audition sucked?
Season after season, the camera-baiting insanity of the auditioners keeps escalating, but has the bar really been set so high that we can’t learn more about this damsel and her cloth avatar
Since we may never see footage of what happened, I’d like us to work together to create the story of this doomed duo.
After the jump, I’ve got some background questions about this photo that I need your help answering. Answer as many or as few as you’d like, but please answer from your heart…
We’ve talked about the “important” movies we just can’t see and the “under-popular” films we wish more people loved, and now I’m wondering… why do we like what we like? Loathe what we loathe? Where is our taste coming from?
I know taste is influenced by all sorts of things—age, economics, family, etc.—but wherever it comes from, it ends up guiding us through hundreds of choices a day. Last week, for instance, I bought the new Pussycat Dolls single (God help me), and I can analyze what I like about it–decent pop lyrics, interesting beat, nice vocal stuff at the end—but the next question is… why do I like those things?
After the jump, I’m going to try a little experiment. I’ll pick a movie I really enjoy, and I’ll try to pinpoint why I react to it the way I do. After that, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the same basic premise. Where are your tastes coming from?
(And next week, we can do the same thing for something we don’t like.)
Has everyone in the world either been on a game show or know someone who has been? Or is my life just really bountiful in this area?
Two days ago, I took the online test to be on Jeopardy!, so hopefully I’ll be on-stage with Alex Trebek very soon. However, I already know two people who were on the show, and one of them actually won his first game. But that’s just the tip of my game show iceberg…
My boyfriend and our mutual friend won on Cash Cab
My friend Jim (of Art Meets Comerce, who are my partners in this site) went on The Price Is Right and won big.
A friend of my boyfriend’s was on the now-defunct Russian Roulette (under an assumed name, no less!)
My friend’s family was on Family Feud in the 80s, and then years later, a picture of them from the show randomly appeared in special game show issue of TV Guide.
Is this normal? Is this how it goes for everyone? Since there are so many game shows, it seems possible, but I’m not sure. When I was young, getting on one of these things seemed like an impossible fantasy, and despite the mounting evidence to the contrary, I still kind of feel that way.
So what are your game show connections? (Bonus points if you actually host a game show.)
I’ll be filming the next Critical Condition video for most of the day, so let me leave you with a bold claim: In 1991, Vanessa Williams perfectly distilled the 1990s.
Need proof? Watch this, the video for her single “Running Back to You.” It’s not as well-remembered as “Save the Best for Last,” but it should be. Because good lord… if a Martian landed on this planet and asked what was cool during the first Bush presidency, this clip would explain everything. (Note: Universal won’t let me embed the video into this post. Curse their coal-black hearts!)
Here are some of the 90s signposts in this timeless classic:
The Hand Chair!
Superimposed, wiggly graffiti flying all over the palce
Neon walls with “zany” patterns
Jam and Lewis backbeats
A rap breakdown
Stone-washed jeans and oversized leather jackets (on Vanessa, no less)
Did I miss anything? I feel like the list could go on forever.
Today was a strange one in my freelance life: I lost a story, gained three more, lost the star of the next Critical Condition video, and then immediately found a great replacement.
To think there was a time when I couldn’t handle sudden change.
Well, to be honest, I kind of still can’t, but my bizarro professional life has been trying to pound that fear out of me for the past four years. Somehow, month after month, I’ve survived (or better), even though there were days I was convinced I’d be living in my friend Kerri’s car. (Kerri, stop driving my living room!)
These are the songs that help me slowly embrace the unexpected. If you’re trying to go with the flow, I say… Crank That Hit!
Have you heard about the PETA Super Bowl ad that got banned by NBC? PETA has naturally plastered the details of the ban all over their website. Thanks to their candor, we now know that NBC’s standards department is uncomfortable with women who lick eggplants and rub their pelvic regions with pumpkins.
After the jump, I’ll post the ad (NSFW) and try to figure out if it turns me on, in a salad sort of way.
Do you guys play Celebrity? You know, where you fish names out of a bowl and try to make your team guess them?
In case you don’t play… in the second round, you can only use one word to make your team guess the name on your slip of paper. And if the word’s a bust, you’re out of luck. You just have to keep repeating it until your one-minute round is over.
Apparently, this word was not a winner. Can you figure out which famous musician I wanted my team to name?
Special thanks to Glark for posting this to the interwebs. I’m praying that somebody out there makes a remix.
Well, I’ll declare: I was going to watch The Amazing Race 4,233 14 anyway, but now I’m extra-super-duper tuning in.
This season, which begins February 15, ridiculously talented director-screenwriter-actor Mike White (of Chuck & Buck and School of Rock) will be racing with his father Mel, a former ghostwriter for Jerry Falwell who quit, came out, and founded the LGBT activist group Soulforce.
If those frat boys from last season can get top three, then Mel ‘n Mike should at least win the million dollars. In a perfect world, they’ll also complete a Road Block that lets them bring marriage equality to a U.S. state of their choice.
I’m putting them on the shortlist of coolest-ever TAR contestants. Would you?
(Thanks to Roommate Joefor pointing me toward the link, which came from AfterElton.)
It’s been a long time since I’ve heard a pop single so heinous that it can be dubbed a disasterpiece, but that day came this weekend. Picture it: Sunday. A cold afternoon. I’m making my bed with the radio on, debating between lunch or a Simpsons episode, when suddenly I hear…
… “Angels on the Moon,” the first single from Thriving Ivory.Â
