By DOUG STRASSLER

I have a problem. See, as an equal opportunity entertainment guy, I catch a lot. I watch a lot of movies, I listen to a lot of music, I see as many shows and concerts as the wallet will allow, and I watch a lot of TV – perhaps even as much as Mark does.  And the past season has seen me add more shows (Glee, Modern Family, Treme, White Collar) than I’ve deleted (but watch out, The Closer – you’re on the bubble!).

That’s one reason why I only enjoy a handful of reality competition shows – I’d rather spend my precious time watching the scripted stuff. I mean, the legitimately scripted stuff. But this weekend I hosted the three most awesome houseguests in the world, and when we weren’t out painting the town, we sat down and watched the most recent episodes from this season of Top Chef. It’s set in DC, the area where my friends live, and where I spent 12 years of my life, so I had a vested interest. Plus it’s about food, which plants it squarely in my wheelhouse.

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Until yesterday, I hadn’t heard of Country Strong, a film that’s being released on December 22. It’s written and directed by Shana Feste, produced by Tobey Maguire (!), and stars Gwyneth Paltrow as a washed-up country singer who’s trying to reboot her career.

I didn’t hear about this movie because I saw a trailer online or read an article about it in a magazine. I heard about it because Gwyneth Paltrow has released a single called “Country Strong” to country radio. (You can listen here.)

This tidbit provoked a couple of reactions in me:

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Welcome to Sucker Punch, the only blog post that ranks the gaudiest moments on this week’s episode of True Blood.

(Warning: Spoilers Ahead)

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What a difference a year makes, you guys. Around this time last season, True Blood and I were in a fight. The turgid Maryann business was driving me crazy, the subplot in Dallas felt disconnected from everything else… it was rough. Now, however, the show and I have more than made up. We’re thinking about moving in together. Because seriously… the series is having its best run of episodes ever.

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Hey everyone! I’m back… and now I live in Manhattan. Whoa!

And you know what I’ve discovered? Nothing helps me come down from a hectic day of moving like an hour of Wipeout, the messiest game show on TV. Andrew and I have been watching a lot of it recently, and it has gotten us through some exhausting encounters with cardboard boxes, window-unit air conditioners, and the zillion tiny nails that Ikea wants you to hammer into the back of your furniture.

In fact, I’d say I’m something of a Wiepout expert now, and as such, I’d like to share my thoughts on why the show is awesome and why, sometimes, it isn’t. Won’t you join me?

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Welcome to Sucker Punch, the only blog post that ranks the gaudiest moments on this week’s episode of True Blood.

(Warning: Spoilers Ahead)

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This episode, “Trouble,” was kind of flawless. It may be my favorite of the entire series.

I’ve been chewing on why this television morsel tastes oh-so-sweet, and here’s what I’m thinking: It perfectly balances the multiple dichotomies of the show. Humor and terror, sweetness and cruelty, sex and romance… we get just the right amount of everything. And perhaps just as importantly, the funny moments spring from the scary ones, the cruelty springs from the sweetness. It’s much more satisfying when one element leads organically to another.

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Hey everyone! Other than the True Blood Sucker Punch, which will arrive tomorrow, The Critical Condition is going to be dormant this week… because I am moving to Manhattan. Woo-hoo! But I’ll be back next week, full of tales of my new borough.

By DOUG STRASSLER

In the past, many of the actors I have written about in this column have fallen under the label of “It’s That Guy!,” performers who may be recognizable but are not necessarily known beyond fringe TV shows or smaller movies. That doesn’t mean that actors who have spent more time in the limelight are exempt from such an honor, however.

Case in point: Today I write in praise of Gary Cole.

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Whoo, lord! I’ve written two lengthy essays for The Critical Condition this week, not to mention a lengthy freelance article and a story for TDF STAGES (the online theatre magazine that I edit by day.) On top of that, I am getting ready to move next week, so my nights are full of packing, shlepping, and trying to find someone to take my couch off my hands.

In other words, I don’t have the energy for thoughtful analysis this morning. I just want to dance.

My perpetually sassy friend Rachel has this thing called “3 Song Dance Break,” where you stop whatever you’re doing and dance-dance-dance as hard as you can for exactly three songs. Then you collect yourself and go back to the task at hand, refreshed and inspired. Here’s a 3 Song Dance Break that I’ll be taking today. What would be on your playlist?

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Welcome to Sucker Punch, the only blog post that ranks the gaudiest moments on this week’s episode of True Blood.

(Warning: Spoilers Ahead)

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Ring ring, hooker. Ring, ring. It’s your Sucker Punch calling, so pick up the damn phone.
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That’s the thing about stupors: You don’t realize you’re in one until you’ve been shaken awake.

In the last few weeks, three films have grabbed me by the shoulders and rattled me hard. Now that I’m alert, I’ve realized that for months and months, I’ve been anesthetized by almost all the stories I’ve absorbed on television and at the movies.

Toy Story 3, Winter’s Bone, and I Am Love after the jump. With mild spoilers.

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